LittleBiggler

Regularization

Mon, 29 Sep 2025 16:48:04 +0000

In hindsight, I was able to suss out a handful of insane outliers (like 25 sigma outliers) that were probably typos, and were most likely causing the regression line to whip back and forth like the infamous 2016 NYTimes election needle.

I thought I was dealing with multi-collinearity and simplex group problems only, but lurking in the data the entire time were some special surprises. It took me way too long to figure out what was going on I will never look at a box plot the same way again.

The Calculus of Spirit

Mon, 29 Sep 2025 15:15:59 +0000

I feel I understand
Existence, or at least a minute part
Of my existence, only through my art,
In terms of combinational delight;
And if my private universe scans right,
So does the verse of galaxies divine
Which I suspect is an iambic line.

"Pale Fire" by Vladimir Nabokov

Update your priors! It's a saying, drawn from Bayesian Statistics, which has fully arrived in the American vernacular, (at least for the podcast-listening crowd). Lately, I have even heard people describe some or another thing as "orthogonal to the discussion." Orthogonality, of course, is the unmistakable language of Linear Algebra. In real time, our language is being shaped by a new set of symbols, from statistics, probability, and matrices. A constellation of pursuits shaping up to be a new field! This new field has been called many things: Data Science, Machine Learning, Artificial Intelligence... We may settle on some other name in the future.

Modelling Uncertainty

Sat, 14 Dec 2024 15:01:41 +0000

When I was a child, I didn't live in space. Adolescence was a time of unpleasant and sudden captivity to Euclidean space. "Normal" sizes. Fat redistribution. Occupying space in general. Adulthood, hopefully, is realizing that Euclidean space is a metaphor for Being, and not the other way around. The primacy of the flesh, in other words, comes to a gradual end in adulthood, if you ever get there.

Bayes: Odds Vector Form

Thu, 14 Nov 2024 20:31:00 +0000

Regardless of whether you subscribe to the view of causality as the ur-metaphor, the OVF will help you learn Bayes in a way that prepares you for more sophisticated pattern recognition.

Specifically, I hope to show how the Odds Vector Form (hereinafter also referred to as the OVF) of Bayes Theorem yields better Bayes formulas than the most commonly used Probability Form. The visual elegance of the vector form commits itself better to memory. Stripped of clunky redunancies, OVF Bayes allows one to add many more variable dimensions easily (by hand, even). A relatively junior coder could write a classification formula that doesn't rely on a library, or even use pencil and paper to calculate the posterior probability of complex scenarios.

When Is Now? A Secular Proof of the Existence of God

Wed, 11 Sep 2024 18:24:00 +0000

At first glance, this post has nothing to do with data science. I hope that by the time you finish, you will understand why it has everything to do with data science. The connection is the distinction between objective reality (being an object) vs. being a trace of an object.

Your Own Personal Loss Function

Wed, 29 May 2024 17:30:00 +0000

For me, heaven is a place where I can take every mathematics class that Professor Gilbert Strange ever taught. Most of the time, I find the pedestal narratives applied to professors at big research universities to be farcical. Why? In graduate school at UChicago, I found many of the tenured professors (who shall remain unnamed of course) to be pompous and not only uninterested in teaching, but actually contemptuous of it. Not Gil Strang, though. Gil Strang wanted to teach, and did it well. He deserves to be lionized, misogynistic jokes about Monica Lewinsky notwithstanding (it's a fallen world, after all). Last year, Professor Strang gave his final lecture. I expect he will not even know what a legend he truly is until Judgment Day.

Promises & Perils of the Bubble

Wed, 17 Apr 2024 18:17:42 +0000

The Sunken Place

Our tinted luxury charter bus bumped and crunched along the patchwork asphalt between LaGuardia Airport to the twee enclave of Bedford, NY. Bus passengers were a who's who of popular high school freshmen, specifically those whose parents were rich enough to send them to France, on a class field trip. We were on the home-bound leg of an international voyage that included Paris, Versailles, Normandy, and Provence. I should remember this trip well, but I barely remember it at all. I will never forget, though, when the entire bus started chanting in unison, about me: "Lilian is COOL! Lilian is COOL! Lilian is COOL! Lilian is COOL!" They wouldn't stop chanting. Couldn't stop. Undeniable unanimous and resounding approval from the popular kids! My membership into their exclusive club, univocally ratified. I blushed and sank into my cushioned seat. Don't they know I am an imposter?

Baking With Math: Bootstrapping

Fri, 01 Mar 2024 19:54:40 +0000

Bootstrapping is an option you take when the data in hand is kind of shitty, so you shuffle it, and resample it to clone more data, and pray that the clone represents reality (the population).

Standard deviation, if you recall from our Baking With Math series, is a measure of how well mixed your batter, which represents, portentously, reality, is. If you take a bunch of spoonful's of your batter, in other words, the mean mixed-upness of those spoonfuls is fairly likely to represent how mixed up the data is in the population. You could get one spoonful that is mostly egg vs not-egg, and get one spoonful that is mostly sugar vs not-sugar, and still your mixed-upness gauge could still be accurate with respect to the overall population.

Counter-Factual Universe

Mon, 29 Jan 2024 15:31:17 +0000

"The Null Hypothesis" is a theoretical alternate universe, used to measure statistical significance. The standard deviation and mean are quantitative measures, used to bootstrap or simulate the probability distribution of a given facet of your alternate universe.

If the piece of evidence you encountered, were it found your alternate universe, would be super super super super super super super duper unlikely, then your alternate universe probably isn't reality, which means your null hypothesis should probably be rejected.

A New Way to Visualize Bayes

Mon, 02 Oct 2023 19:23:00 +0000

A lot of instructional resources go into visualizing Bayes Theorem, to help the visual learners out there. This post is about how I was ultimately able to wrap my head around Bayes. I hope it is helpful to you!

You Wanna Bet You Can Derive Bayes?

First of all, as we proceed through this exercise, I want everyone to understand that Bayes Theorem is nothing special. Don't get me wrong!!! The Bayes formula is elegant because of its almost infantile simplicity. Bayes distills the quintessential formula by which humans learn about the world. And compute power unleashed by modern semiconductors has enabled machines to crunch countless parameters very quickly, so as to yield highly accurate predictions. None of this is unimpressive... But let's not lose sight, in spite of all of the hype, of how simple and mundane the core idea of Bayes' Theorem is.

Labor Force Participation and "Disability"

Wed, 20 Sep 2023 14:39:46 +0000

Data Source: Bureau of Labor Statistics - Labor Force Participation

In another post I explored the relationship between labor force participation for women, versus fertility rates. In that analysis, I stumbled upon the fact that women's labor force participation in the United States peaked around 2008, and has only declined since then. Initially, I thought this could be due to millennial women dropping out of the labor force to raise babies, since the fertility data shows that women in their thirties are having more babies now than they did in decades past.

For Rent: Big Juicy Brain

Tue, 05 Sep 2023 18:04:28 +0000

Brian Esperon - YouTube

UChicago Professor, Martha Nussbaum, wrote an excellent article in The Journal of Legal Studies, which explores (and refutes) six arguments against the legalization of prostitution. The article title, "'Whether from Reason or Prejudice’: Taking Money for Bodily Services," is a reference to Adam Smith's The Wealth of Nations. Smith writes about stage performers, like singers and dancers, whose work is considered respectable, only if unpaid. If they are paid, their work is considered, “whether from reason or prejudice, as a sort of publick prostitution.”

Women's Labor Force Participation vs. Fertility

Wed, 30 Aug 2023 16:35:16 +0000

Data Sources: United Nations Population Division and US Bureau of Labor Statistics

In his excellent book, The Decadent Society, Ross Douthat observes that women tend to go on strike, when society expects them to have children and a career. And they go on strike, not by demanding better working conditions, which might be more conducive to having children. They go on strike by refusing to have children.

Ian Underlayer

Fri, 25 Aug 2023 15:09:29 +0000

Who Owes What to Whom?

Wed, 23 Aug 2023 12:46:14 +0000

We have turned a corner in the public discourse, and in how discourse translates to institutional behavior, and it is not progress. While "progressive" social, economic, and onto-theological ideas have failed at every ballot box except the chief executive, these ideas have won in business. The New Right is right on this one. They're wrong in so many places, but they are right on this one. Ross Douthat, Sohrab Amari, Michael Brendan Dougherty. They are onto something here.

Killing Me Softly

Mon, 21 Aug 2023 13:34:16 +0000

Why is it OK to make choices, which are inherently violent, as long as you perpetrate your violence "politely"? What's more, the polite and even pleading response to the violence, somehow, is rude? As a "neurodivergent," I have never understood this duplicity. Killing me softly is still killing me. Perhaps I am being guileless, and failing to read between the lines? I have had people say to me, "Well, of course the people who have money and power execute at an arm's length and with decorum, and victims are always blamed." As if this is a given. But I am not a victim, so why does the script get flipped on me, when I speak up?

Moral Myopia

Wed, 26 Jul 2023 13:24:38 +0000

I have perfect vision still, even at the age of 40. My vision is getting worse. I can certainly feel it start to go. But it still registers as perfect, which means that in my youth, my vision was better than perfect. In short, I have eyes like a hawk; which I suppose comes as no surprise, given how many pilots there are in my family.

Brooklyn Loft Renovation

Mon, 24 Jul 2023 16:33:45 +0000

In true millennial fashion, my husband and I got a mortgage together before we got married. We bought a dark, cavernous, shabby Brooklyn loft, which I happened to stumble upon on FSBO, after we lost every bidding war for townhouses in far flung Bed Stuy, Stuyvesant Heights, Flatbush, and Crown Heights. The loft was in a building that had been converted from a vacant soap warehouse, into residential lofts, by the notorious "Joshua Guttman."

Retreat

Wed, 12 Jul 2023 14:20:40 +0000

Secular Religion

Thu, 06 Jul 2023 00:45:05 +0000

The secular system does not transcend or overcome the logical necessity of theology. It thinks it does. It's positively sure that it can dispense with God, and that you are a fool for still believing. To be fair, the higher you move up the class and IQ ladder, this ceases to be true. Theoretical physicists and sophisticated doctors are often at very least open to faith, if not believers themselves. But kickboxing this strawman is my favorite hobby, and it is a strawman that appears everywhere you look these days.

About

Mon, 03 Jul 2023 16:50:50 +0000

This is a place for me to share projects, artwork, and ideas

Some days I have strong views. Other days I feel more detached.

I sooner respect people with strong views than no views.

However I concede the possibility that strong views are a waste of time.

Whitehead Building

Mon, 03 Jul 2023 16:32:57 +0000

Haverford

Harrison's Alley

Mon, 03 Jul 2023 16:30:56 +0000

Vinegar Hill

Self Portrait

Mon, 03 Jul 2023 16:08:34 +0000

On the floor

A/C

Mon, 03 Jul 2023 16:06:34 +0000

Sold to Ramon

Je me souviens

Thu, 29 Jun 2023 21:36:35 +0000

My biggest fear when I was mate seeking was that I would fall in love with a man's soul, but that we would lack chemistry, and have a sexless marriage. I have been in love with men, whom I was nonetheless not physically attracted to. Love is more than friendship, for me, if I feel that I share a home with a soul, that we have known each other forever, and can tell each other anything. I prayed and prayed to find a man whose mind dovetailed my own, and whose bodily presence made my stomach flutter. I have lost many things in life, and have not gotten what I wanted in many departments; but in this one respect, I am incomparably blessed.

For Your Own Good

Thu, 29 Jun 2023 18:09:50 +0000

There is a cure for yeast infections, but you don't know what it is. Almost nobody knows what the real cure is. It's not available at CVS. Your gynecologist will not prescribe it to you, or tell you about it. You may ask, how do *I* know what the cure is, then, if it's such a big secret? Well, I learned it from a super old Wall Street Journal article, of all places. The article is probably archived now. If you are industrious and you have a paid WSJ subscription, I assume you can find it. For me, anyway, it no longer shows up on Google results.

Test

Tue, 27 Jun 2023 14:38:51 +0000

Test

Dumbo

Tue, 27 Jun 2023 13:58:51 +0000

Test

This is the philosophy blog

Tue, 27 Jun 2023 13:47:46 +0000

This is where you can read my demented thoughts, if you are literate enough.

Hiring: Deeded Courtiers

Sun, 22 Jan 2023 15:04:35 +0000

In the days in which monarchies were the state apparatus, before merchants became richer than kings, there were the royals, the peasants, and in-between the two classes, the courtiers. Courtiers were often deeded, in legal documents emitted by the king. They had documented privileges and rights to property, and they could expect that their loyal service to the king and queen would be repaid in promises of security and dignity for their own children. Kings and Queens, in turn, kept these promises not out of duty or beneficence, but because being physically surrounded by well-connected people who hate you is a substantial coup risk.

Gender Negativity

Sun, 22 Jan 2023 00:30:04 +0000

I wanted to add an update to this post, to hopefully soften the tone a bit. If you know me, you know that I am an overflowing cup of passion. Personally, I cannot think of many things more evil than a medical system in which countless middle class kids (and adults) don't have health insurance, while others kids are steered into medical procedure pipelines that end in sterilization and permanent disfigurement. I don't know how to talk about this subject dispassionately.

The It, the I, the Con-I

Sun, 15 Jan 2023 23:12:01 +0000

Translations of Freud into English, when his writing first became a global sensation, did not know what to do with the the central terms of his philosophy.

The data types, to use a metaphor, of the human being script, are das es, der ich, und der über-ich. And ultimately the goal of psychoanalysis, the process Freud invented, was to tidy up the human being, to create a situation "wo es ist, da werde ich sein" ("Where it is, there shall I be."). Of course, I probably already sound strange, if you have only vaguely heard of Freud. Freud is about the id and the ego, right? And the id wants to sleep with its mother and kill its father, whereas the ego has to be civil, so it gives birth to a super-ego. Something like that?

What Faith Feels Like to Me

Sun, 09 Oct 2022 16:54:16 +0000

I have spent most of my life in secular spaces. Even the religious people I know are mostly culturally religious. They practice religion because it's what their families do, and not because they profess to believe. There's this idea in secular spaces that faith is silly, and maybe even obsolete. A relic of a pre-scientific past.

This page is for data science tags

Thu, 29 Sep 2022 17:53:40 +0000

Big Data Public School Rankings

Thu, 29 Sep 2022 17:23:03 +0000

Who cares about "Good Schools"?

Do me a favor: Pull up a real estate listing online... Maybe it's the dream house you have saved on Zillow, or a starter apartment near your job. Maybe you were not previously aware that every single real estate listing displays public school rankings. Go ahead, find the school rating on that property listing. It is there, and if you are a parent, it's often the first thing you scroll down for.

Linear Algebra, Metaphysics, and Free Will

Thu, 22 Sep 2022 16:47:32 +0000

I am a verbal person: A trained philosopher, an amateur writer, a reader, a pontificator, an armchair political pundit. I am the person who feels she has something worth saying. Recently I decided the best thing for me to do would be to force myself to do some serious Mathematics, which I used to be really very good at, back before the turn of the century. I decided to take my Humanities-soaked brain and make it do STEM again. I expected to refresh my memory about the joys of Mathematics. I did not expect that I would gain key philosophical insights, which is what happened.

On Miracles

Sat, 17 Sep 2022 18:51:49 +0000

In the past I held the Hume view that the only miracle of Christ is that people believe in Christ, given how far removed each of us is from whatever happened to initiate the rumor of a resurrection. But if you look at the academic literature in the field of Religion, you quickly learn that "miracles" are not all that rare, and that the universe and our world is brimming with unexplained and seemingly inexplicable phenomena, even for our current explanatory frameworks, aka "science."

Cruelty Is Funny?

Fri, 02 Sep 2022 15:36:09 +0000

Nietzsche has been trending on social media, among the MAGA/Incel/Anti-Woke crowd. My unscientific understanding is that this cohort consists mostly of aggrieved white men, who are either downwardly mobile, or perceive themselves as downwardly mobile. Whatever the case may be, I am sure that these men are not especially *literate* (they're usually outright hostile to all things literary) and Nietzsche is not especially easy to read, even for pretentious academics. His writing is cryptic and often dense. Why ever would Nietzsche be trending among the disguntled men of Twitter or Reddit??

Define Woman

Mon, 29 Aug 2022 18:08:26 +0000

A few things I should probably say before all of this. I am not trans. I am not pro-trans (I am not anti-trans). My own son has no siblings other than a sister, and for a long time, he wanted to (and often did) wear her clothes. He is a kid, and all kids love flowers (anything in nature, really), bright colors, and rainbows of course. But even I have actively discouraged my son from wearing girl clothing.

The Parent-thetical

Sat, 27 Aug 2022 01:31:38 +0000

Being a parent is opening a thousand parenthetical thoughts in one utterance, and never being able to close them, because your kid runs off or faces some impending hazard, and you go. Mostly it is about sounding like a rambling lunatic who never finishes a thought. Like an old geezer whose mind is shot (or Donald Trump).

False Positives and the Non-Intuitive Denominator

Wed, 20 Apr 2022 18:43:59 +0000

There are a bunch of videos on the internet that attempt to explain what I will call the "Diagnostic Test Fallacy" via Bayesian math. The explanations are helpful, but I find that they don't stick in my information-addled brain. The other day, I tried desperately to reassure a friend who got a harrowing blood test result, for a blood test that seeks to diagnose extremely rare disease. The experience of trying to reassure a friend in dire need of reassurance helped me distill the following:

Robot Leadership?

Mon, 07 Mar 2022 19:57:50 +0000

We have more data now than ever before. If decision-making is an informed process, then we have more information than we know what to do with. In theory this superfluity of information means that our leaders should be the best equipped to make decisions of any leaders who have ever lived. Rather than rely on "gut feeling" decisions, leaders of any kind can now make informed choices, with realtime segmented data, and therefore leaders can make better choices, right?

Hegemony of the Carpet Lawn

Tue, 16 Nov 2021 15:30:54 +0000

The term "back water town" is used in the pejorative, to indicate a town where little of significance happens, other than storing reserve drinking water for more urbane places. I grew up surrounded by reservoirs, which were created with varying sizes of dams, never once putting two and two together, that I in fact lived in a back water town. As the aesthetic of the American suburb becomes increasingly artificial, it is ever easier to forget that most of suburbia is in fact watershed land. Rain washes through our yards, percolates into the soil, and eventually winds up in reservoirs.

Baking with Math: Composite Random Variables

Mon, 04 Oct 2021 19:08:36 +0000

In another post I discussed how the metaphor of baking helps me retain intuition about the all-important statistical concept of variance, insofar as it draws a very clear line between what I can know theoretically, versus what I can only know empirically, that is, through taking samples.

Baking with Math: Variance

Mon, 04 Oct 2021 15:31:45 +0000

I like to think of statistics not as pure math, but as baking with math. Other kinds of math, like geometry, linear algebra or calculus, or probability theory, remain within coherent abstract systems, which follow from self-evident properties of numbers, sets, and equations. Many of the formulas in statistics, on the other hand, are crutches and workarounds; they are meaningful because they work and not necessarily because they cohere in a logical system.

My First Ever API Call

Mon, 20 Sep 2021 20:22:24 +0000

"Learn to code," they said. So that is what I did. This blog post is about my first foray into using an API for data science, and describes in detail the issues that I encountered, as well as the code that I used. I hope that it may be helpful to someone else out there who is just starting out.

Down Girl: The Logic of Misogyny

Fri, 04 Jun 2021 14:53:41 +0000

In her excellent book on the subject of misogyny, Kate Manne helps clarify what misogyny is and what it isn't, and in so doing, provides a useful roadmap for younger generations of women to understand and give voice to their predicament.

"He's not a great guy, but he's not a monster."
"He may not be the best person in the world, but it's not like he's a rapist."
"He's not a misogynist! He loves women. Some of his best friends are women!"

These types of character defense plays are abundantly familiar to women. We are often the purveyors of these narratives, telling ourselves and our friends that what we saw with our own eyes, or heard with our own ears, was perhaps misunderstood, because after all, "He's not one of those guys." Apparently, only serial killers, rapists, pedophiles and torturers are true misogynists.

F-Train Packed

Sun, 11 Apr 2021 18:23:15 +0000

Marshall Arts Building Woods

Sat, 10 Apr 2021 16:41:25 +0000

Foggy Day in Dumbo

Sat, 10 Apr 2021 16:38:31 +0000

Scabby on Water and Jay

Sat, 10 Apr 2021 16:34:33 +0000

Baptist Church

Thu, 18 Mar 2021 19:22:27 +0000

130th St Summer

Thu, 18 Mar 2021 19:12:31 +0000

Jay St Coffee Drinker

Thu, 18 Mar 2021 17:18:34 +0000

My Love

Thu, 18 Mar 2021 17:16:26 +0000

Cloudy Beach Day

Thu, 18 Mar 2021 17:05:19 +0000

Swiss Alps

Thu, 18 Mar 2021 17:03:17 +0000

Two Women at Robert Moses

Sun, 14 Mar 2021 18:06:03 +0000

Why Psychedelics Feel Like Enlightenment

Thu, 04 Mar 2021 23:06:22 +0000

I had a professor, Aryeh Kosman, who was one of the world's premier Aristotle, Plato, and Early-Modern philosophy experts, and I still thank the lord I was able to study under him in college. An old bald white-bearded man originally from the Bay Area in Cali, he brough his socks-and-birkenstocks style to the little East Coast Quaker school where I washed up. He said he had been friendly with Timothy Leary during his years as an undergrad at Harvard, and he told us that in the sixties, when LSD first became widely available for recreational use, it was known as "the enlightenment drug," a drug that you could take one time, shed your old self like a molting reptile, and see clearly for the first time.

If you think your relationship with God makes you special, you're doing it wrong.

Wed, 03 Mar 2021 00:56:00 +0000

God loves all of his children. If your spiritual journey takes you to a place where you feel more loved than other people, like God likes you just a little bit more than others, then you haven't arrived at your final destination.

What would perfect knowledge do to every individual who has ever lived? What if every thing, state of mind, idea, and facet of the universe were revealed to every person who has ever lived?

Hiring: Mothers Only

Tue, 02 Mar 2021 20:38:22 +0000

Having children makes things all-too-real on multiple planes of reality, in a way that privileged people and especially fathers are poorly equipped to deal with, since being privileged just is the ability to live one's life as if it's a dream... merrily merrily merrily, right? Fleshy reality, deathy reality, and even the mushy stuff of social reality, become heightened to the point of existential discomfort, even panic, under parenthood. Few people emerge from having children unchanged. Those with a disposition open to learning, are transformed to the core.

I Pity Michael Bloomberg

Sat, 15 Feb 2020 21:10:35 +0000

First of all, I know that former Mayor Michael Bloomberg doesn't give a shit about what I think. I assume that if he knew me, he would think of me as fat, lazy and dumb, simply because I am not anorexic (anymore), I believe in having a life outside of the office, and making money is not my primary goal. Statistically speaking I am much thinner, smarter, and harder working than average, but I doubt those things would matter to Michael Bloomberg, since (unlike New York City society women) I am a freakishly large Size 8, my intelligence leads me to question money, and I work hard at being a mother full-time.

The All-Knowing Judge

Tue, 31 Dec 2019 03:30:32 +0000

There is a typical Christian copout, which is deployed more and more these days, as Christians struggle to justify why they as a political coalition have lent their support to a vainglorious, adulterous, murderous, greedy, gluttonous, raging sloth, simply because he agrees with their quite unchristian views on immigration.

Is Religion a Sham?

Tue, 31 Dec 2019 01:52:06 +0000

It's almost like the message itself is a miracle.

Jesus was a wandering pauper, whom powerful politicians detested.

Yet he and his scrappy disciples led one of the most successful people's revolutions in the world.

And yes the message was coopted throughout the thousands of years.

Be Loved

Sat, 22 Jun 2019 02:08:34 +0000

Meaning-making is the task of locating oneself on a spectrum between two poles:

Beloved, and F^cked.

As opposed to play, in which there is no task required. Play can be about making meaning, but at its core, it's about not having a "task" at hand (because somebody else has done the work for you.)

The Day That Time Stopped

Sun, 07 Apr 2019 18:33:28 +0000

I remember the day that time stopped. Inconspicuously, it was Sunday, April 7th at 2:24 in the afternoon (or 14:24 as some might say). It was not out of the ordinary in any way, as a day. But April 7th, 2019, something shuttered. The wrench that was stuck in the gears finally snapped. The machine, which keeps track of time, and let's face it, owns time, finally snapped.

Diary of a Shitty Employee

Tue, 22 Jan 2019 16:19:09 +0000

I am actually not a shitty employee. I'm a rare combination of creative and organized, and if you as an employer endear me to your vision, I will work tirelessly and with undead agility to make you more successful than even your wildest dreams. There's nothing more ecstatic to me than a shared victory. What I am is an at will employee, in every sense of the term, not just in the legal sense. Capital and labor often use the same words, but everyone knows they mean very different things by them.

On Earth as It Is in Heaven

Fri, 18 Jan 2019 01:54:35 +0000

Everyone is entitled to a fix. If you ask me, this is a constitutionally protected right. Pursuit of Happiness should be annotated however, to "Pursuit of happiness and/or acceptable substitute." Everyone should have a legal right to a calorie free, low-harm drug, like cannabis, or nicotine. It used to be that there was no low-harm option for most of these drugs, because you had to inhale smoke to imbibe them, but that is no longer the case. Cannabis is available as a medicinal grade substance in many states, and can be vaped without combustion. Most nicotine vaping mechanisms suck, but JUUL has figured out the essence of cigarettes, which is to enable nicotine to be free-based, giving the user a pleasant rush, except in a form that doesn't kill your lungs.

Panic: The Untold Story of the 2008 Financial Crisis

Mon, 07 Jan 2019 18:56:59 +0000

Last night my husband and I watched Panic, a new documentary by Vice, about the 2008 financial crisis. The documentary, from its opening credits onward drew a pretty clear and blunt narritive arc, from the 2008 financial crisis to the election of the know-nothing populist demagogue, Donald Trump. To sum it up: Hank Paulson, Tim Geithner, and Ben Bernanke stepped in to save the US (and global economy) from another Great Depression. But people were too dumb to understand why Wall Street needed unspecified unconditional bailouts, so populism happened.

A Mother's Conditional Love

Tue, 01 Jan 2019 18:55:41 +0000

Google "A Mother's Unconditional Love," and the first page of results (and probably a lot more pages) will be filled with guileless blog posts about the magic and special nature of Mom's love. The phrase "A Mother's Unconditional Love" itself has worked its way into the popular consciousness, and tracing its origins would probably be a fascinating PhD thesis.

Why Aren't You Suicidal?

Thu, 27 Dec 2018 19:34:18 +0000

Social Media is the gift that keeps on giving, apparently, and most recently some American celebrities have gifted us with candid thoughts about feeling suicidal. Kanye West and Pete Davidson come to mind, but I think there were others. That this is surprising to people, or that others rush in to say fluffy warm things about treating mental illness...surprises me.

#FacebookPearlHarbor

Tue, 25 Dec 2018 00:56:59 +0000

Has anyone seen the video of Putin and Mohammed Bin Salman doing the frat boy handshake? The image of their handshake is burned into my brain forever. I can watch it in my mind's theater replaying over and over. Enter Stage Right, the puppet King of America, complete with orange clown makeup and cotton candy hair. Seemingly unawares, as a puppet might be, of the hands inside the frame.

"The Woman" Behind Every Man

Mon, 17 Dec 2018 16:26:38 +0000

In today's world we can't assume any longer that everyone wants the same version of happiness. We can assume, however, that everyone wants some version of happiness, even those people who seem to love to be miserable. In order to paper over this quandy: of how unique individuals can nonetheless be said to be totally alike, modern "P.C." discourse has leaned upon freedom, as a crutch, as a distraction, as an excuse.

Cookie Monstrosity

Mon, 10 Dec 2018 15:27:23 +0000

My son has always been an eater. There was never a breast or a bottle or a type of food that he turned down. When he hit 14 months or so, he started to get a little bit distracted, presumably inured to the excitement of new tastes and textures. The arms race of getting him to eat started out slowly. Initially a toy or two to play with during a meal were enough. Then, we would need to put on a show with these toys. Then, feeding him while watching a TV show would suffice. Then he needed his own screen to manipulate (a smartphone or tablet) in order to eat. Now, we need to read him his favorite books or he won't eat.

My Son

Tue, 24 Oct 2017 17:14:53 +0000

The white dudes and sprinkling of others who are in power don't want you to have time for play, they want you to aspire to their psycho version of masculinity, they craft the storylines of our dreams from the casting couch, they choose only delicate waify women wearing hooker heals to be leading women, they pair old grizzled men with younger partners who never age, they approve which commercials go to air, they approve which images get printed on packaging. But the men who consume and role play these identities are mostly not powerful.

My Brother

Tue, 24 Oct 2017 01:51:42 +0000

My brother lived in my parents basement. My brother died in my parents basement. When it happened, I was home for winter break from my Masters studies in Chicago. Marc, my older brother, was working a tech job in Greenwich, CT, his first job out of college, and living in the basement of my parents house in an NYC suburb, as he had done since he was 17 or 18. He had gone to college locally, so he never left home.

I Am Fat and It's Fine

Mon, 09 Oct 2017 19:24:27 +0000

I don't know who gets to define generations. There is no governance around it as far as I know. The guys who coined the term "Millenial" say that millennials are born after 1980. I've seen 1984 as the cutoff. The concept of a generation or a zeitgeist is the stuff of humanities, which sadly tend to bring up questions about the nature of truth, and rarely seems to get to the interesting questions. Schools of thought, consensus, data, blah blah blah. The fact is that we all know that a generation is something, and embedded as we are even in alienated skin, we get it.

Absconding Backside

Mon, 25 Sep 2017 19:27:31 +0000

Baby humans are never quite so fascinated with a toy, or some other artifact of human artifice, as they are when they discover the absconding backside of that toy. The underside where screws and utilitarian parts of extruded plastic betray the fantasy. The tag on which manic safety warnings threaten possible futures. The glasses on daddy's face, which correct his poor vision. The underside of the television remote, where a plastic kangaroo pocket opens, and reveals the batteries inside.

Undressing of the Day:

Wed, 06 Sep 2017 13:17:09 +0000

Organic produce and products are a lie, which condition you to think that you can cash in your privilege to be spared in the event of extinction. What they don't tell you is that it's already happening, and organic produce won't save you.

You Can Only Blame a Face

Sun, 03 Sep 2017 00:30:29 +0000

Only faces can be blamed. A face is the blameworthy object, par excellence.

There are truly blameworthy faces. The faces of men and women who find themselves in power and charged with decisions that deeply affect people's lives.

There are faces that are held up for blame. Fat faces, indulgent faces, lazy faces, black faces, female faces.

God Is My Camera

Sat, 05 Aug 2017 14:21:36 +0000

God is my camera.

Jesus is my Instagram.
The Holy Spirit is my social network.

catholichumor

Shitty Births

Sat, 05 Aug 2017 00:37:33 +0000

If you don't fight back in life chances are your humanity will be robbed from you. A food company's best client is a bulimic. A pharma company's best client is a sick person. A clothing company's best client is a shopaholic. A credit card company's best client is a debt slave. And any of these company's best workers are workaholics, who have no time for friends, family, or meaning.

CVS

Wed, 19 Jul 2017 21:42:09 +0000

I went to CVS the other day to buy pantyliners. It was an ordinary trip, other than the fact that I got pulled over for running a red light, though I'm sure it was yellow when I had the right of way. I don't drive around blowing red lights with my infant in the car. My parents were also with me, it was their car in their suburb, the suburb I grew up in. My dad, who was in the front passenger seat of the car, got testy with the police officer, but I didn't even care.

Your Love Has Been Weaponized

Wed, 19 Jul 2017 16:17:48 +0000

You have been denied your being. The actual stuff you are made of has been denied to you. What ever has been that wasn't something to somebody? If nobody else than just the god that you imagine is sitting watching dead stuff to make it keep being? You are what keeps history alive. The comet's tail of now, without you, without us, there literally is nothing.

Infant Formula

Mon, 08 May 2017 17:09:32 +0000

I belong to a couple of moms groups in New York City. One in Chelsea and one in Brooklyn Heights. The groups are very different but one thing is consistent: the shame women express about failing to breastfeed.

Now is a particular time in the history of breastfeeding, when the pendulum approaches an extreme. At least in New York City, which admittedly was the heir to billionaire mayor Bloomberg's Latch On campaign. Maybe it's not a big deal in other parts of the country.

Mother's Breast

Wed, 19 Apr 2017 18:23:50 +0000

Mammals. Mammaries. Mama. Mom. The very class of animals to which we belong is named after the breast. The words "mommy" and "mama" are also the same word. Animal identity equals breast equals mom. In many Latin-based languages like Spanish and Portuguese, the word is actually identical. "Mama" means both breast and mom. In any case, it's clear that breasts, moms and mammalia are very closely tied concepts. Freud famously said "I am the breast," when he described his (maternal) relationship to his patients and ability to heal their psyches.

Babies Are Tiny Humans

Mon, 17 Apr 2017 22:34:18 +0000

There are a lot of things you learn when you decide to have a baby. There's the required reading of pregnancy books and baby manuals. There are the handful of websites that come up when you google any question + "pregnant." But the one thing that nobody mentions, nobody warns you about, is that babies are little humans.

Who Gets Tender Lovin?

Fri, 24 Mar 2017 14:37:04 +0000

Philosophy can be divided into two main camps: ontology and ethics. Ontology is the study of Being, and ethics is the study of what constitutes a good life, given the nature of what we know about being. For example, if you think that nothing really is, and Being is an illusion in the minds of men, maybe it follows that men can do whatever they choose without lasting consequence. If you think that Being is absolutely, maybe you think that science is the path to freedom. If you think that Being is relatively, that is absolutely but mediated through meaning, maybe you are a social democrat.

Human Centered Design

Sat, 11 Mar 2017 14:50:13 +0000

To me it is obvious that humans should be the primary preoccupation of design. Then again, a lot of things are obvious to me, which seem not to be obvious to the general public, if there is such a thing. Like what? Oh, I don't know, how about the fact that economies produce people, not goods and services, for starters'? Yet economies are measured in GDP and we are obsessed with size size size, rather than whether our country produces people whom anyone wants as company.

Battle of the Suicides

Fri, 20 Jan 2017 21:42:53 +0000

Outside of the 7th Avenue F Train stop in Brooklyn yesterday, I witnessed a funny New York moment. An Amnesty International sidewalk solicitor startled a passerby. "Huh?" he stammered, "Do you care about human rights?" the Amnesty lady repeated, more loudly. "NO!" the guy barked, annoyed at the interruption, and barrelled down the subway steps. I laughed to myself, and felt a moment of solidarity for authentic rude New Yorkers.

Poor White Tweeters!

Thu, 27 Oct 2016 22:40:21 +0000

Political Correctness is having a moment, see exhibit, Donald Trump. The moment is due to a confluence of factors: Social media, Civil Rights, and the alienation inherent in modern "market economy" life. Taken together, what might otherwise seem like a good thing, i.e. more inclusive standards of civility, is suffocating to a significant contingent of people. The question du jour seems to be, "Why do I need to be so canned all the time?" I argue, it's a fair question, without defending Trump's brand of political correctness.

Douchebags Give Me Hope

Mon, 11 Jul 2016 20:59:35 +0000

Douchebaggery is a concept that has prevailed throughout my tenure on earth. Rather than some stupid vulgarity, I think the concept shows how rich our language is, and merits serious consideration. Everyone hates douchebags, everyone recognizes one when they see one, and we all have a sense that it's a distinctly modern personality type... Something that came on the scene in the 70s or 80s. By understanding what makes various types of douches douches, I think, we can understand what it means to be human, with broad implications for politics, economics.

Ivanka! No!

Fri, 08 Jul 2016 22:57:33 +0000

I don't think about Ivanka Trump very often, but when I do, I'm torn. Ivanka speaks in a deep assertive voice, which oozes calculating intelligence. She uses overly correct English, meticulously cleansed of any hint of a regional accent (unlike her father, who has more than a hint of Queens in his manner of speaking). She sounds like PhD women whom I found intimidating in graduate school, or prominent women who achieved senior positions of power, WITHOUT the crutch of being 'hot' or 'sexy'.

I Am an Angry French Waiter

Thu, 07 Jul 2016 14:30:31 +0000

When I was about 11 years old we took a family trip to Paris. My dad's family is Swiss, so we went to Switzerland almost every year, and we occasionally stopped at other places in Europe. I still remember the tiny medieval BnB where we stayed in Paris. It was just a house that rented out a few spare rooms. They made fresh baguettes every morning with homemade jams and local honey. I also remember the French waiters...

Just Cut It Off

Tue, 28 Jun 2016 01:54:59 +0000

This Spring I broke my wrist in a snowboarding accident. When I heard and felt my wrist crunch like a dry tree branch, my first thought was, "Shit it's definitely broken." My next immediate thought was, "Shit I should have switched from CIGNA." After those two thoughts the pain came rolling in, and thinking became harder to do.

Utopia Check: Venezuela

Mon, 20 Jun 2016 12:52:55 +0000

If democracy is only as good as your electorate, socialism is only as good as your management team. Hugo Chavez's management team did the hardest part of organizational change: They inspired their people to dream big and take bold measures. Most large organizations rot from the inside for decades or even centuries and nobody emerges to distill the disparate grumblings of the people. Unfortunately his management team also lacked the know-how to execute their vision.

Economists Are Dickless Lovers

Fri, 17 Jun 2016 02:19:57 +0000

Sorry for the headline. It's really not meant to be an insult. In fact, even an economist will tell you they prefer a frictionless universe. And what is a dick but a friction device? Its essence is friction. Economists will therefore readily admit they prefer the lack thereof. Rather than an insult, it's a compliment.

The View From Nowhere

Mon, 13 Jun 2016 00:03:24 +0000

If beauty is in the eye of the beholder, then what does it mean to be a "10"? Numbers imply that something can be measured, which in turn suggests some objective truth. After all, the numbers don't lie. But numbers don't tell the whole story either. So what is left out?